Well it's the first day officially that Lil and Ry are gone. I miss Ry, and I kinda miss waking up at 6 to get him up and ready..... anyway, i'm sad, but I know I'm doing the right thing. Just the fact that it's Christmas time and I want him to have a Christmas with me. I wish me and Lil worked out, but she has an excuse about everything in her life. It was bring me down. Right now I feel like I can't get ahead and everything is falling apart around me. Wow do I starting to feel like a big failure.... I hope I can start overcoming my mistake and start getting back to where I was. I guess time will tell.
peace...
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